Uh oh

Former Met, Red Sox (Sock?), Expo, and Dodger pitcher Pedro Martinez passed his physical and signed with the rival Phillies over the All Star break. The three-time Cy Young award winner is a noted head case who will undoubtedly use the Mets' unwillingness to re-sign him as a motivational tool to help pitch the Phillies past their rivals. Fortunately for Mets fans, Martinez is also composed mostly of paper mache and hair gel, and seems unlikely to remain healthy for even the 15 or so starts he will be expected to make. Let's start bidding now on how long it will take Pedro to land on the DL. 10 starts? 5? Wait, WHAT? He's ALREADY ON THE FUCKING DL???? Well there you go Phillies fans! Enjoy those 6-8 starts Pedro gives. I bet when he gets really amped up to face the Mets he'll even pitch into the 5th inning!