Showing posts with label Kemba Walker. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Kemba Walker. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Three times as nice


Going into last night's national championship game against Butler I identified several keys to success that would lead to a national title for the Huskies:

1. Kemba Walker must be either a scorer or a distributor early. UConn's success this season has been directly tied to Kemba's ability to create offense.

2. Jeremy Lamb must step up as a viable scoring option. Butler's well-deserved reputation as a giant slayer is built upon their ability to shut down the opposing team's best player.

3. Alex Oriakhi must stay out of foul trouble. UConn has a definitive advantage in size and athleticism inside but it is entirely linked to the mercurial sophomore forward.

4. Roscoe Smith must get involved offensively early. Smith is a talented low post player who has the ability to stretch a defense with the occasional long jumper but as a freshman he has disappeared from games by missing a couple of shots at the beginning of the game.

5. Jim Calhoun cannot get out-coached. Brad Stevens is as talented a basketball mind as there is currently coaching in the college ranks right now. The popular belief was that Stevens would be able to scheme a defense that could at least slow down Kemba Walker and his experienced team would rain open threes to victory.

So what happened?

1. Kemba Walker shot 3 for 11 for 7 points and 0 assists, providing none of the dynamic offense that UConn typically relies upon. Additionally he picked up two fouls and sat a nearly unprecedented 3 minutes in the first half.

2. Jeremy Lamb shot 0 for 2, picked up his second foul with 9 minutes to go in the first half and was a complete non-factor.

3. Alex Oriakhi was for a force on both ends of the floor scoring 4 early points and picking up 4 early rebounds but unfortunately he also picked up his second foul with over 10 minutes to go in the first half and had to watch the rest of the frame from the bench.

4. Roscoe Smith missed both of his early shots and turned into a shot-blocking turnover machine. He also picked up his second foul late in the second half.

5. Jim Calhoun spent much of the first half munching on the souls of abandoned kittens, somehow oblivious to the fact that his lineup to end the first half was Shabazz Napier, Tyler Olander, Donnell Beverly, Jamal Coombs-McDaniel, and Charles Okwandu.

How did UConn survive the apocalypse scenario and emerge victorious? They watched Butler have an historic shooting night. No team has ever shot so poorly in a national championship game. To find point totals so abysmal you have to go back to the 1940s, years before the implementation of a shot clock or a three point basket.

UConn actually represented itself pretty well in the second half against an excellent defensive team, scoring 34 points on 42% shooting. They were still atrocious from the three-point line, finishing at 1 for 11 overall but when they had such an advantage athletically they were able to dominate inside like we have never seen before. The Huskies out-scored the Bulldogs 26-2 in the paint. The interior defense certainly helped but Butler was missing layups like someone had threatened their beloved mascot. Oh hey maybe I just uncovered an alternate theory! It is a shame because the resiliency of the Huskies to go 14-0 in tournament play as well as the nearly unbelievable run from Butler to play in back-to-back national championship games was overshadowed by the ugliness of the game. When it is all said and done, UConn emerged victorious and unless your team is coached by John Calipari, that is all that will be remembered in the record books.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

UConn basketball is good or something

In case you missed it, the UConn men's and women's basketball teams are going to their respective Final Fours this weekend. This marks the first time this has happened since UConn did it two years ago. In all seriousness it is really, really hard to do for any team not based in Storrs. The women's Final Four will feature two teams, UConn and Stanford, that have made the last four Final Fours. Before you get on your high horse about women's sports and parity, just remember the Red Sox and Yankees finished first and second in their division every season from 1998-2005 so blow me.

Anyway, the Huskies are led by their respective stars, Kemba Walker and Maya Moore. ESPN took advantage of their proximity to sit down with the two All-Americans before they jetted off to Houston and Indianapolis. It was an intense look into the daily lives of two college athletes furiously finishing their studies between relatively meaningless basketball games as their work towards their all important degrees. I kid, I kid, it was a typical ESPN fluff piece featuring two kids who have not seen the inside of a classroom in a month. Notice that the interview was done with both athletes sitting down because it might embarrass Kemba to stand next to the taller Maya.

Questions that ESPN should have asked and did not: Who got more tail during their time at Storrs? Who can bench press more, Maya or Shabazz Napier? Which was the bigger cheating scandal, Jim Calhoun and the phone calls or Geno Auriemma and the illegal tours of ESPN?

Answers that should have been given to questions that were actually asked: What skill of Kemba's would Maya like? Dunking. What skill of Maya's would Kemba like? Bringing a girl to orgasm.

Monday, February 28, 2011

"Don't get Kemba Walker riled"


So saith the first line from the Associated Press recap on ESPN.com of UConn's 67-59 win over Cincinnati. What did the offending fan say to get Mr. Walker so riled?
"I missed a shot and he said, 'Chris Paul wouldn't miss that shot," Walker said, referring to the New Orleans guard.
HOLE E SHIT! OH YOU DID NOT! Roll Delonte West off of LeBron James' mom, because this shit is ON!

How did Walker respond? He went on a personal 7-4 run to push a teetering 8 point lead to 11 en route to scoring 16 points, only 7 below his season average. BAM!

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Kemba Walker is a fan of the NBA

What do you do when you have picked up your dribble 18 feet from the basket and have no shot and no one to pass it to? Well if you are UConn star Kemba Walker you simply lob the ball off the backboard to yourself and smoothly lay the ball in for two points. ESPN's Andy Katz asked how much he was thinking of LeBron James who pulled a similar move against the Pacers a couple of nights ago. Walker responded by saying he actually thinking of Kobe Bryant, who has done it a few times himself. Throwing it through the FUGO translator, I am pretty sure Kemba is saying, "No I do not model myself after LeBron, he screwed an entire city. Now Kobe, he only screwed that one girl in Colorado."