NHL Playoffs, Round One Recap

Round 1 of the Stanley Cup playoffs wrapped up last night, and I must say it went out with a bang. My recap of the series as follows:

1 San Jose v 8 Anaheim

San Jose choked on a big fat dick again. Joe Thornton doing his best Pamela Anderson imitation below.


2 Detroit v 7 Columbus
3 Vancouver v 6 St Louis

Detroit dominates AGAIN. Vancouver doesn't suck. The Blue Jackets and Blues were probably just happy to be there.


4 Chicago v 5 Calgary

The Blackhawks emerge victorious versus fire! Actually, that's pretty cool. It's like revenge for the extermination of the people native to this land. Er, kind of.


1 Boston v 8 Montreal

The Bruins win 4 games to 0 in a series that was nowhere near as close as the final margin indicates.


4 Pittsburgh v 5 Flyers

I'm telling you man, the Penguins have fucking missiles. Also, the Flyers kind of suck.


I know what you're thinking, didn't I just skip two series? I did. 6 of the 8 series were inherently uninteresting. The other two went 7 games. Stay tuned for exciting recaps of the remaining two series.