Dig it bitches, it's hockey season!

I danced a jig in the kitchen today. Well, not really a jig because I can't dance, but I did shuffle from side to side with a stupid smile on my face and an erection. That can mean only one of two things and I'm pretty sure they're not letting me go to another prom! Finally, after eight (ish) long weeks of waiting, hockey has returned to our lives! Since there's obviously nothing else going on in the world of sports these days, I figured I'd whet everyone's appetite with a little something something from a minor league preseason hockey game. CAN YOU FEEL THE EXCITEMENT?!?!

There is one less Manuel in the NL East

Much to the surprise of no one the Mets parted ways with manager Jerry Manuel and general manager Omar Minaya today following their second-consecutive 4th place finish despite a monsterous payroll. Manuel was a decent enough teacher of the game, but seemed baffled by bullpen management and pinch hitters. He is perhaps best suited for the American League where he won manager of the year in 2000. There he can simply fill out a lineup card then catch the highlights of the game on Sportscenter.

It was not all Manuel's fault. He was constantly saddled with an incomplete roster due to Minaya's inability to handle minor league transactions and injuries, as well as his ill-fated decision to hand contracts of 3 year, $36 million to Oliver Perez and 4 years $24 million to Luis Castillo. For the bulk of his final two years as manager, Manuel was fielding a team of 23 players and 2 living paper weights against rosters with 25 actual baseball players on them.

We Mets fans now turn our eyes to a hopefully rosier future while stubbornly pretending to ignore the fact that the team ownership somehow manages to be frugal while weilding a payroll in excess of $130 million. Maybe next year the team can invest some of their riches in a fully functional training staff after injuries to stars Jason Bay, Carlos Beltran, Jose Reyes, and Johan Santana once again decimated the team's chances of finishing the year above .500. Also, maybe next year the team can set loftier goals...

Hahahaha the Mets are terrible!

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Middle Eastern Promises
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Rally to Restore Sanity

Above is a clip from the September 28th Daily Show with Jon Stewart. Skip to 2:25 for Stewart making fun of the Mets. Or watch the whole thing because he's a funny, funny man and you need to smile and laugh sometimes if you root for the Mets. As a side note, the standings are total bullshit. The Mets would be WAY better than .500 at home if for no other reason than the travel fatigue alone! Also, I'm pretty sure the team hasn't gone 7-3 over a 10 game stretch in about 3 years.

Troy Polamalu is fucking awesome

I'm not saying he's the most important player in the NFL, but could you see the Steelers going 0-16 without him? I can. Just watch the video.

It's time for another monthly post!

Every now and again you come across a headline that is too good not to share. In many cases you will be one of a select few who actually clicks on the link because it's an article about a retired hockey coach and Americans hate hockey more than they hate Muslims. Anyway, the headline of the article found here has the title, "Pat Burns sets record straight". Perusing the article, you find Burns felt the need to let the world know

that he's still very much alive, despite reports and thousands of tweets suggesting otherwise.

The former NHL coach, who is battling cancer, called TSN of Canada hockey columnist Bob McKenzie on Friday after seeing reports of his death at age 58.

HOLE LEE SHIT! You mean to tell me that in the Internet Age we still need to bop a guy over the head with a frying pan to toss him onto the wheelbarrow? Here's to hoping that Burns adopted a British accent when he called his buddy at TSN.

Sometimes you just have to unretire

Every few months I like to pretend I'm blogger. I'm not saying this is one of those months, but I came across a story so incredible I felt the need to share it with you all, my faithful reader.

The Knicks have asked Isiah Thomas to serve as a team consultant. Yup, it's so incredible it all has to be a hyperlink. Let's focus on the meat of the article:

Thomas told ESPN.com Friday that he accepted a more formal and unique consulting position with his former employer, where he will help Knicks general manager Donnie Walsh make decisions on draft picks, trades and personnel decisions.

Thomas' drafting wasn't actually so bad. He oversaw the selection of Trevor Ariza, Channing Frye, David Lee, Renaldo Balkman, Mardy Collins, and Wilson Chandler. He also swung a trade for the draft rights to Nate Robinson. Taken as a whole, it is not a terrible draft haul, given that Lee is a legitimate 20/10 guy, and Ariza, Frye, Chandler, and even Robinson are all useful pieces on winning teams.

That brings us to trades, and this is where Thomas just cannot control himself. It started innocently enough with a swap of bench players, sending Clarence Weatherspoon to the Houston Rockets for Moochie Norris and John Amaechi. Unfortunately for Knicks fans everywhere, trades turned out to be like crack for Thomas, and he wanted to get higher and higher each time. His next move was to trade for Stephon Marbury, sending along Antonio McDyess, some other players, and draft picks for the mercurial Suns guard. When I say "some draft picks" I mean, "Utah drafted with the Knicks pick this year because Phoenix got so many of them in the Marbury trade they couldn't possibly sign them all so they traded some away."

Yep, SIX YEARS after the trade, the Knicks were still getting fucked by it. For their troubles, the Knicks got one trip to the playoffs, a four game sweep at the hands of the New Jersey Nets. That trade alone would be enough to put Thomas in the Pantheon of worst GMs of all time, but there was more, so much more:

• He traded for Tim Thomas, because he needed to pair a shoot-first small forward with his shoot- first point guard.


• He traded for Jamal Crawford because he needed to pair a shoot-first shooting guard with his shoot-first point guard and his shoot-first small forward.


• He traded for Quentin Richardson, because he needed to pair a shoot-first small forward with his shoot-first point guard, his shoot-first small forward, and his shoot-first shooting guard.


• He traded Tim Thomas to the Bulls for Eddy Curry because he had too many shoot-first small forwards and he needed an overweight 7-footer with a heart problem who can't score, rebound, or defend.


• He traded for Jalen Rose because he felt somewhat empty with only one shoot-first small forward.


• He traded for Steve Francis because he needed to pair a shoot-first point guard with his shoot-first point guard.


• He traded Steve Francis and Channing Frye for Zach Randolph because with all the skill on the perimeter, he obviously needed a 20/10 guy who needs the offense to run through himself to be effective.

And those are just the trades! He also loved throwing huge contracts towards middling players like Jared Jeffries and Jerome James. This brings us to the personnel decisions. Just for fun, we'll list the head coaches during Isiah's tenure along with their records. Now obviously, some of this has to do with the poor talent on the team, but if there is ever an award for finding the worst possible match between coach and players, I am guessing they will call it the Isiah:

• Don Chaney (15-24)
• Herb Williams (17-27)
• Lenny Wilkens (40-41)
• Larry Brown (23-59)
• Isiah Thomas (56-108)

Thomas' run of ineptitude included "being the subject of a sexual harassment lawsuit brought by a former team employee that cost the organization $11.6 million" but he still "remained close to [new team president Donnie] Walsh and Madison Square Garden chairman James Dolan." Maybe that's why Walsh traded away first round draft pick Jordan Hill, the rights to swap 2011 first round picks, and the 2012 first round pick to Houston for Tracy McGrady and cap space! It was a deal that had Thomas' greasy fingerprints all over it.

Well at least they're trying!

The Mets lost to the surprising Nationals 6-4 yesterday afternoon, falling to oh for the season in the rubber games of three game series. On the bright side the team battled back from early 2-0 and 4-2 deficits before K-Rod said, "Fuck this, I know you bastards aren't going to score and I am NOT waiting around for extra innings in this miserable weather!" Roger Bernadina hit his second career home run, which just happened to be his second home run of the day, to account for the winning margin. Of course it wouldn't have been the winning margin if the Mets pitchers could have retired their fucking counterpart, Craig Stammen. The Nationals pitcher went 2-2 with 3 RBI. Bernadina's home run would not have won the game had he not already saved the game with a spectacular diving catch with the bases loaded and two outs to end the bottom of the fifth and keep the score tied at 4. It was #4 on Wednedsay's web gems below. In other words, fuck you Roger Bernadina!

Adding a verb to the hockey lexicon

A mere three weeks ago, Philly upset New Jersey and Boston upset Buffalo, setting the NHL up for its dream scenario of the Pittsburgh Crosbys facing off against the Washington Ovechkins with a spot in the Stanley Cup finals at stake. Unfortunately, commissioner Gary Bettman forgot to forward the memo to Montreal goalie Jaroslav Halak. Ovechkin claims he saw Halak's hand shake after a Washington goal early in their first round series. Apparently Halak overcame his nerves, to the tune of stopping 131 out of 134 shots over the last three games of that series to stun the top-seeded Capitals. The Montreal netminder proved it was no fluke turning back the defending Stanley Cup champions in seven games, including his second straight game seven road victory. Pittsburgh Penguins fans, I welcome you to the club. You have been...HALAKED!

The Marian Hossa Rule

It is a little known fact outside of hockey circles but the Chicago Blackhawks are destined to play in the Stanley Cup finals. Sorry to both San Jose Sharks fans out there, but the facts are indisputable. This is good news for whoever survives the Eastern Conference since the Blackhawks are destined to lose in the finals.

Two years ago the Pittsburgh Penguins acquired Marian Hossa at the trade deadline, a move that helped them reach the Stanley Cup finals before losing a thrilling series to the mighty Detroit Red Wings.

Last season Hossa signed with the Red Wings, spurning a more lucrative offer to remain in Pittsburgh because he "wanted the best chance to win the Stanley Cup, and [he feels] like Detroit is the team." The Penguins would go on to defeat the Red Wings in yet another memorable Stanley Cup finals.

This season Hossa signed a 12 year, $62.8 million contract with the Blackhawks. Only San Jose stands between Hossa and another opportunity to watch the opposing team raise the Stanley Cup while pondering what could have been.

A lesson in defeat

With the Mets trailing 6-1 in the 5th inning and Manny Acosta on the mound, I did something I will almost never do; I turned off the game. The team was hitting but they could not put any runs on the board. No offense to Mr. Acosta, but if he is pitching that early in the game it is time to catch up on some DVR. I flipped back to the game and it is the top of the 8th inning, the Mets have Jason Bay on third, David Wright on second, and Ike Davis at the plate with no outs. The Mets have been in the situation time and again this season, and the story is always the same. Except last night. Davis reached on an error that allowed Bay to score (6-3), and the Mets followed with a strikeout (1 out), a LONG two-run double (6-5), a bunt single, a run-scoring single (6-6), a run-scoring, pinch-hit double (7-6), an intentional walk, an unintentional walk with the bases loaded (8-6), a strike out (2 outs), and an inning ending flyout. All in all the Mets sent 12 men to the plate against three Nationals pitchers for their largest come-from-behind victory since last July. Oh yeah, and Ike Davis did what Ike Davis does to end the game:

BOOM goes the dyno-Ike!

Holy crap that's a bad headline! The Braves Kenshin Kawakami tried to sneak a fastball by Ike Davis and Davis responded with a "FUCK YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" deep breath "OOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!" 450 feet later Davis had his first major league home run en route to a 5-2 Mets win. John Maine was so impressed he pulled himself from the game in the 4th inning before he could blow the game. Hisanori Takahashi was so impressed he threw 3 strong innings in relief of Maine and struck out 7. Braves third-baseman and noted Mets slayer was so awed he not only dropped a later Ike Davis popup, he failed to catch Jose Reyes' popup with 2 on and one out in the 7th inning when Reyes was already retired on the infield fly rule. Braves catcher Brian McCann was so stunned he then threw to first base trying to double off Luis Castillo because obviously you have to tag up when the ball isn't caught? The throw left home plate uncovered and allowed Angel Pagan to score. Listen, it was an impressive fucking home run. Watch the highlights here on ESPN.com.

Well that's good news

I don't know if this Jayson Stark ESPN.com article is Insider only, but let me quote the part that has the most relevance to this blog:

Mets (6-9, last place in NL East)

Rating: Reality

Twice in the last week, we've heard two scouts make a remark like this: "I think Washington is a much better club than the Mets."

From where we Rumblers and Grumblers sit, we wouldn't go that far. At some point, you can take these predictions to Vegas: Jason Bay will hit a home run. And Carlos Beltran will get a hit. And Francisco Rodriguez will save a game. And a starter other than Johan Santana and Mike Pelfrey will win a game. But is this a good enough, or deep enough, team to hang with the Braves, Phillies and Marlins? We're not hearing anybody say that except the Mets themselves.

"You know, baseball needs the Mets to be good," one scout said. "Baseball is more fun when the Mets are good and that rivalry between them and the Phillies is cooking. But this just isn't a real good team. If you look past Santana, and Pelfrey the way he's pitched so far, you see where the Mets' problems lie. They've got legitimate concerns in that rotation. I watched that bullpen six days, and they've got four guys on pace to pitch over 80 games. That says their starters just are not getting deep enough. And I don't see that changing."

Strap in boys and girls, it's going to be a looooong season! Here's an awesomely awful photoshop to celebrate!

Ike Davis makes losses exciting

The Mets got thumped by the Cubs 9-3 last night. Ollie Perez was effectively erratic, allowing only 3 runs while pitching only 5 innings. The bullpen did its best imitation of Mets bullpens past by giving up 6 runs and slamming the door shut on any potential Mets comeback. The highlight of the night by far was Ike Davis' spectacular catch in foul territory where he flipped over the railing to the Mets dugout. I'll post a YouTube video of the catch, but once they remove it you can just go to this post from MetsBlog.com to see the catch as well as David Wright talking about...well, something. I'll be honest, I didn't pay much attention since was standing there looking all buff and rugged in his sleeveless shirt.

Playoff update

My distaste for the Bruins is not a secret. That being said, their potential elimination of the Buffalo Sabres makes for a deliciously juicy Eastern Conference playoff picture. The NHL does not subscribe to a bracket style playoff system, so after the first round the highest remaining seed plays the lowest remaining seed, and the two middle seeds battle it out. Had the seeds held, the Capitals would once again be facing off against the Penguins in round two. With both Boston and the Philadelphia Flyers on the verge of upsetting their higher-seeded opponents, Washington and Pittsburgh look to be the top remaining teams in round two. That sets up the potential of a Caps v Pens eastern conference finals, which is what everyone wants to see anyway.

Wrapping up Wednesday night's action, the Caps won going away and the Canadiens goalie was not happy about it. Hey Carey, don't want to see the other team celebrate in front of you? How about making a fucking save? The Bruins won in double overtime. They actually scored THREE goals in this game. Of course, it took them nearly a half a game longer to reach that lofty total so let's go ahead and call that an average offensive night. The most exciting game of the night was Vancouver's 6-4 win in Los Angeles. This game saw 5 goals scored in the third period, or as many as the Bruins and Sabres scored total in almost 5 periods of play.

Let's call it a winning streak!

The Mets topped the Cubs last night 4-0 to win their second straight, likely their longest winning streak of the year. The win assures the Mets at least a split of their 4 game series, meaning they officially cannot lose a series for the first time this season. Jose Reyes was the hitting star, collecting four hits including a two out, two RBI triple that provided all the runs Mike Pelfrey would need. Big Pelf went seven strong innings, running his shutout streak to 19 consecutive scoreless frames. Rookie Japanese pitcher Ryota Igarashi proved to be a true Met in the 8th inning by slipping while attempting to field a bunt and straining his hamstring. On most teams you'd expect him to be back on the mound in a few days. Since it's the Mets, I assume he'll have the leg amputated some time this summer. The highlight of the game for me came in the bottom of the 8th inning when Fernando Tatis' two out, pinch hit home run gave the Mets a 4-0 lead and denied Frankie Rodriguez a save opportunity. Despite the team actually winning 6 games this season, K-Rod has only pitched in one save situation which he promptly blew.

Caps win!

I'd love to give you some details about the game, but between Ike Davis debuting for the Mets and the fact that Versus showed the Bruins game instead, I don't have a clue. That's right, even though the game was locally available on NESN, Versus chose to show the Bruins, a team that hates offensive players over the Capitals. Both teams won, one team scored five goals the other team scored two. Guess which was which? This is like opposite world from baseball, who probably would have blacked the Bruins out on both channels. Anyway, Ovechkin scored, the Caps won and took a 2-1 series lead over the Canadiens.

In other hilariously ironic news, the Toronto Maple Leafs nabbed the second pick in the upcoming NHL entry draft, a pick they sent to Boston in exchange for high scoring winger Phil Kessel. Kessel had the audacity to score 30 goals for the Bruins in the '08-'09 season, signaling the end of his time in Boston. The Bruins will likely take center Tyler Seguin or winger Taylor Hall with the second pick, hoping to spin the talented forward for additional draft picks as soon as he dares to score 30 goals for the team.

The Ike Davis Era has begun

Heralded first base prospect Ike Davis made his major league debut last night. The move reeks of desperation, but let's be honest here, it's not like he can be any worse than Mike Jacobs. "Strike out fewer than 12 times out of every 14 at bats and play at least below average defense? Got it skip!"

Davis did more than that, going 2 for 4 with a broken bat single in his first at bat and an RBI single later in the game. He also flew out deep to right-center field where the wall stands an impressive 415 feet away showing flashes of the power the Mets hope he can provide from first base.

Oh yeah, the Mets won too. 6-1. So that's kind of nice. That's two wins in three games, or likely their most successful stretch of the season. Jon Niese pitched well, Jason Bay got an actual RBI, and the awesomely named Angel Pagan hit his first home run of the year. All in all a successful debut for Davis, who hopes to play at least 5 or 6 more games this year before suffering a season ending injury.

John Carlson...winner

Hey, remember back in January when the US team stunned Canada in overtime to win the world junior championships? Turns out there may have been some talent on that American squad, and overtime hero John Carlson just keeps proving his mettle. Since being called up for good on January 15, Carlson recorded a goal and 5 assists while seeing 15 minutes of ice time a night. Add to that his first playoff goal, as he tied a wild affair in Washington at 5 with only 1:21 to go in the third period. Nicklas Backstrom would score 31 seconds into overtime, proving the age old adage that one hat trick (Backstrom's) is better than another (Montreal's Andrei Kostitsyn's) when you have a 20 year old kid from Natick, MA playing defense who only knows how to score heroic goals. At least, I'm pretty sure that's how it goes.

Things you can do during a 20 inning baseball game

Johan Santana struggled early but quickly rounded into form and pitched 7 strong, shutout innings. Jaime Garcia stifled the Mets, not even allowing a hit until the 5th inning. It seemed likely that the first team to score would win the game, and FOX would have its shortest Saturday afternoon broadcast in quite some time. Well...maybe not.

Here's a fun fact. Did you know that if a game lasts 20 innings, you can watch the first 10 1/2 innings from the bar, leave to watch a movie, then catch the final 3 innings back at the bar? I found that out Saturday night. I also found out that you can play a 6-5 overtime NHL hockey game in less time than it took the Mets and Cardinals to resolve their offensive inefficiencies. That's right, the plodding, low-scoring NHL managed to score 11 goals while the Mets and Cardinals spun an additional 9 scoreless innings. I believe it was around the 10th inning when the Capitals versus Canadiens game kicked off.

All you need to know about the Debacle in St Louis is that the Mets woeful offense managed to scratch out 2 runs on 3 hits in the 18th, 19th, and 20th innings. Of course, those innings were pitched by Cardinals position players, and one of the three hits was by Mets pitcher Raul Valdes in his second career at bat. He was promptly thrown out trying to reach second base when the shortstop's throw sailed wide of first. I guess a win in April is as good as a win in September, even if it took 24 of the 25 players on the active roster and St Louis pretty much conceding the game after about the 14th inning.

The player of the game has to be St Louis' Ryan Ludwick who not only managed to get thrown out trying to score from second on a ground ball to the second baseman, he also managed to get thrown out trying to steal second with Albert Pujols at the plate trailing by a run in the bottom of the 19th. Pujols would promptly double and eventually score the tying run. Reached for comment after the game, a miffed Cardinals manager Tony LaRussa said, "We kept trying to lose the fucking game, that team over there is terrible!"

Stay class Philadelphia

A man, well, a 21 year old boy was arrested after intentionally vomiting on an off-duty police captain and his 11 year old daughter at Wednesday night's Phillies game. When I first read the story I wondered, "Was the game played in Philadelphia or Washington?" Just kidding. You didn't even have to tell me the teams involved and the first place I would have guessed would have been Philly. I read the details of the story on ESPN.

I have to say as an angry drunk who does stupidly inappropriate things nearly every waking moment, this is some level of sophomoric stupidity I just don't understand. Am I just old? I have hazy recollections of being 21 and I never seemed to think of vomit being an appropriate retaliation for anything! For cripes sakes man, have a little self respect and dignity! Just wait 7 years until the daughter is 18 and impressed with your ability to buy beer, then have sex with her and never call her again. Amateur.

Hockey playoffs started!!!!

Four series began last night. ESPN's experts weighed in on each series. Let's see what they said and what transpired.

4 Pittsburgh versus 5 Ottawa

First of all, fuck Pittsburgh. They did the same fucking thing last year where they failed to win enough games to sew up the two seed which would lead to a potential Eastern Conference Finals pitting Crosby against Ovechkin. Anyway, according to Scott Burnside, the Penguins have too much depth at center and their goaltending is too good. Before the series started, he predicted Pittsburgh in 6. Game 1? 5-4 Ottawa.

2 New Jersey versus 7 Philadelphia

New Jersey ACTUALLY won the Atlantic division, earning the 2 seed and (theoretically) avoiding Washington until the conference finals. According to Pierre LeBrun, you should never bet against Martin Brodeur in a 7 game series, and in fact sees New Jersey prevailing in 7 games. Game 1? 2-1 Philadelphia.

4 Phoenix versus 5 Detroit

Pierre LeBrun picks the Wings. Of COURSE he picks the Wings. You always pick the Wings. They always fucking win. It would be boring except their teams are so damned awesome year after year. Their stars weren't quite as good as years past, they dealt with some injury problems, and Lidstrom finally started looking old, but after the Olympic break no team in hockey won more games. Phoenix is a nice story of a decent hockey team struggling in a stupid market that has no business hosting an NHL team. But hey they won enough games to lock up the 4 seed, something they only did one other time since the playoffs switched to their current format back in '93-'94. It was fun while it lasted but let's let the real hockey teams on through. Game 1? 3-2 Phoenix.

1 San Jose versus 8 Colorado

San Jose is ALWAYS the top seed. They ALWAYS lose. It's just one of those things. It couldn't possibly happen again, could it? Not with Dany Heatley adding to the scoring punch. Not matched up against a reeling Colorado team who surprised everyone just making the playoffs but struggled mightily since the Olympic break. The San Jose team is too deep, too talented, and too experienced. Scott Burnside certainly think so, he picked the Sharks in 5 games. Game 1? Uh, I guess the Sharks will win 4 straight because Colorado took it 2-1.

So there you have it. Four series predictions from ESPN and four supposed upsets in game 1. At least they're consistent!

About last night

Well, the dream of a perfect season ended in Flushing last night, as the Mets fell to the Marlins 7-6 in 10 innings. On the bright side, the Mets rallied from a 6-1 deficit to tie the game in the 7th and 8th innings. On the down side, they really didn't do much except walk to the plate and fall asleep on their feet as the Marlins bullpen issued 6 walks, hit a batter, and let the tying run score on a bases loaded balk. To be fair to Leo Nunez, the game-tying balk was a bullshit call, but that might have just been the umpire punishing him for refusing to throw strikes.

For me the highlight of the game was Jason Bay's nice running catch in left field putting to rest for at least one night the fear he couldn't handle Citi Field's cavernous outfield. He ran a long fucking way to track that sucker down. The lowlight was easily Fernando Tatis getting thrown out at home trying to score on a passed ball with the bases loaded and two outs. David Wright was at the plate with a chance to give the Mets the lead. I guess he was just trying to save David the embarrassment of failing to come through in the clutch. Uh, thanks?

Screw the AL!

Sure they have better teams, and more talent, and slaughter the senior circuit in interleague play, but that doesn't make them any more fun to watch! You know who agrees with me? The umpires! Poor Joe West actually had to stand there and pay attention to all three games and he wasn't happy about it. "It's pathetic and embarrassing. They take too long to play."

I've long suggested that baseball's image crisis is partly related to the media's insistence on designating Red Sox versus Yankees as the best match-up in the game just because they generally have the best players. I call bullshit! Even the more likable characters in the plot such as the Red Sox David Ortiz will wander out of the box to take a leak, have a chat with the crowd, and sip some steroids-laced tea between pitches. For fuck's sake man, I know you're going to strike out, you know you're going to strike out, everyone knows you're going to strike out (except Terry Francona of course), at least stay in the box and be quick about it!

When ugly is beautiful

The result was predictable, the game was anything but. The UConn women's unstoppable basketball powerhouse won its second consecutive championship, its 7th overall, and ran its unprecedented winning streak to 78 games. The foe was a familiar one, a Stanford Cardinal team that has met the Huskies in three consecutive Final Fours and holds the distinction of being the last team to emerge victorious. No slouches themselves, the Cardinals would be working on a tidy 59 game winning streak of their own if not for the pesky girls from Storrs. The two premier teams in the game whose combined 1 loss (and 0 to teams other than each other) was the fewest combined losses entering a championship game in history. Of course if you didn't know any of this you might have thought ESPN was airing a random high school girls basketball game when the halftime score sat at 20-12. 12!!!! This is the team that had annihilated every opponent by double digits for 77 consecutive games, and they had 12 points at halftime! In the previous 5 games of the tournament, they had surpassed 12 points by the 6 minute mark of each game. In the 25ish or so years Geno Auriemma has coached the team, the 12 points tied a record of ineptitude. After a tidy 26-7 spurt to start the second half, the Huskies found themselves in control and held on down the stretch. It was the lowest scoring national title game in history, but it still counts in the record books. Maya Moore won most outstanding player honors and deservedly so, but Tina Charles defense cannot be understated. All in all both teams played with grittiness and guts and all sorts of other adjectives you attach to shitty games when the play itself was so awful you need to justify talking about it afterward. Oh well, at least it was more exciting than the fucking Red Sox/Yankees game.

Opening day running diary!

That's right boys and girls, yesterday was opening day for the Mets, and as such I shirked my duties at work to listen to the game and record the fun. Unless you're a coworker, in which case I worked diligently all afternoon. We pick it up just before opening pitch.

For the record, I’ll be leaving at some point in the later innings, so hopefully I’ll be turning off a Mets blowout victory. Here are your starting lineups, starting with the Marlins:

Coghlan, LF
Maybin, CF
Ramirez, H, SS
Cantu, 3B
Uggla, 2B
Paulino, R, C (there's apparently more than one Paulino!)
Ross, C, RF
Sanchez, G, 1B
Johnson, J, P

Today's starting pitcher for the Marlins, Josh Johnson, has never lost to the Mets in his career.

Cora, SS
Castillo, L, 2B
Wright, 3B
Jacobs, 1B
Bay, LF
Matthews, CF (I KNEW Pagan was too good to start. Fucking Manuel)
Francoeur, RF
Barajas, C
Santana, J, P

The Mets lost their first 8 opening day games. Since then they are 31-9 far and away the most successful opening day team since their inception in 1962. True story.

- Top of the 1st -

1:11 – Started with a strike! Start measuring those fingers for rings! 1-1, fuck it, I give up

1:12 – Well the first batter of the season pops out to third. Howie Rose is explaining to us how Santana had offseason elbow surgery so (a) he sucked last year because his elbow hurt and (b) he might suck this year because he’s coming off surgery.

1:14 – I’m clapping in my office for the strikeout. It’s possible I’m too excited for baseball season. STRUCK HIM OUT!!! WOO!! Maybe I should close my office door. Or do work. Nahhhhhh

1:15 – 1, 2, 3 inning. Hey, 8 more of those and the worst we have is a tie!

- Bottom of the 1st -

1:18 – Alex Cora leads off for the Mets. That’s like all the excitement and fun of Jose Reyes, but the exact opposite. Sweet.

1:19 – Hey, leadoff batter gets nicked by an inside pitch and he gets first base! Let’s hope this isn’t the high point of the season.

1:20 – Well Castillo grounds into a fielder’s choice but beats out the throw to first to avoid the double play. Just two more years and $12 million left on that contract. At least he sucks at defense.

1:22 – HOME RUN DAVID WRIGHT! Hahahahaha. An opposite field line drive. Jebus. They already dowsed that excitement. He did the same thing last year on his way to a career low 10 home runs. 2-0 Mets.

1:23 – Mike Jacobs strikes out. Just kidding. He just took strike one.

1:24 – Mike Jacobs strikes out. I mean it this time. Here comes Jason Bay to strike out. I hate this lineup with Jacobs in it.

1:26 – Two strike single to left field! Sweet, I love this lineup!

1:27 – Gary Matthews Jr pops out to the catcher in foul territory. I forgot he was batting 6th. Ugh. 2-0 Mets after 1.

- Top of the 2nd -

1:31 – Jorge Cantu pops out to the catcher in foul territory. I guess he was impressed with how well it worked out for Matthews.

1:32 – Dan Uggla grounds out to Wright at third. Wright’s defense is a little overrated. His Ultimate Zone Rating (basically his ability to turn balls hit into his area into outs) was a woeful -10.4 (I believe 0.0 is average). He did have two above average seasons in ’08 and ’09 so maybe his power struggles were related to an injury that also hurt him defensively.

1:34 – Matthews tracks down a ball in the gap for the third out. Hey, maybe he’s NOT the worst defensive centerfielder playing? I know, I know, sample size.

- Bottom of the 2nd -

1:37 – Francoeur just saw his 5th pitch of his at bat. That must be a record. Or he’s still asleep. He grounds out to third on pitch 6. Still, that at bat has to be considered a win for him, as far as outs go.

1:40 – Barajas flies out to shallow center. The catchers are terrible offensively this year. Hopefully they are as good defensively as advertised.

1:41 – Santana grounds out to first. Well, we don’t want him tiring himself out running the bases anyway. No that is NOT a defense of the DH. Dick. 2-0 Mets after 2.

- Top of the 3rd -

1:43 – Cora just made a sprawling stop to get Cody Ross leading off the inning. Ross apparently has a calf strain. It sounds like something Reyes would have been able to reach standing. Get well soon Jose!

1:48 – Gaby Sanchez singles up the middle after a lengthy at bat where he fouled off a bunch of pitches. Not what you’re looking for against the #8 hitter.

1:50 – Johnson sacrifices Sanchez to second. Well, at least Santana didn’t walk him. It was a little sketchy there for a minute.

1:52 – Coghlan pops out to Jacobs in foul territory who doesn’t drop the ball or fall down trying to catch it. So he’s better than Mo Vaughn? My mom laughed at that.

- Bottom of the 3rd -

1:56 – Cora grounds out to the pitcher. I think that’s the extent of his power.

1:58 – Castillo works out a walk. That’s better than last at bat!

1:59 – Castillo steals second! It's a dangerous play because you don’t want to run into outs with Wright up. Until he falls apart, I guess.

2:04 – Wright works out a walk. It was a great at bat. Too bad Jacobs is going to strike out.

2:06 – Jacobs strikes out. Yep, you can’t make this up.

2:10 – Bay strikes out. This is going to happen a lot, especially with Jacobs and Bay back to back. 2-0 Mets after 3.

- Top of the 4th -

2:13 – Santana strikes out Maybin. According to the announcers he is just over-matched by Santana’s change up. I like hearing things like this.

2:15 – Single for Hanley Ramirez. Cora had no chance but Reyes might have, I assume from what I saw on the radio.

2:17 – Ramirez steals second. Damn, I was hoping that wouldn’t happen as much this year with these catchers.

2:21 – Cantu walks. The pitch count is rising…

2:23 – Matthews catches a ball in the gap and then lazily throws it back in allowing both runners to advance. At least he made the catch?

2:24 – Paulino pops out to shallow center. This game might be decided by the bullpens.

- Bottom of the 4th -

2:30 – We join this inning already in progress. Jeff Francoeur just walked. I hope I didn’t die taking a leak. I don’t want to be discovered holding my cock.

2:33 – Barajas popped to shallow center and the ball drops in front of Maybin. We’ll go ahead and call that a lucky hit. Bases loaded, apparently Matthews got on base. Good for you Gary!

2:34 – Santana pops out. Well he’s probably pissed, but at least he didn’t hit into a double play. 1 out.

2:34 – Cora lines into a double play. Bases loaded, nobody out…0 runs. Hey, nice lineup you’ve got there Jerry! 2-0 after four.

- Top of the 5th -

2:37 – Cody Ross pops out to Castillo to lead off the fifth. Keep those at bats short and outs Florida!

2:42 – Sanchez flies out to right. Pitcher coming up. Let’s make this a quick inning Johan!

2:43 – 3 pitch strike out. Nice, quick inning. Maybe he’ll be able to pitch into the 7th?

- Bottom of the 5th -

2:46 – Castillo grounds out to short.

2:47 – Wright lines out sharply to third. He knocked over the thirdbaseman who held onto the ball. That’ll learn you for making David out! Mmmm…making out with David…wait, what?

2:48 – Jacobs is coming up to strike out. I lied, he popped out weakly to second in far and away his most productive at bat of the game. I think I hate the Mike Jacobs era. Get well soon Murph! 2-0 Mets after 5.

- Top of the 6th -

2:50 – Coghlan singles to lead off the 6th.

2:55 – Still a runner on first after a visit from a coworker. What did I miss?

2:56 – Coghlan steals second. Barajas never even got a grip on the ball to throw it. Overall I’m unimpressed with the quality of his base stealing prevention. By the way, there’s 1 out. Er, 2 outs. Ramirez strikes out. Oh, he struck out Maybin, too. 2 outs, runner on second.

2:59 – Double for Cantu to drive in the run. 2-1. Close play at second base where Cantu was called safely. The throw beat the runner and Castillo apparently missed the tag. Hey, only 2 years and $12 million left on that contract!

3:00 – The crowd boos as replays show Cantu was out.

3:03 – Unintentional intentional walk. Uggla didn’t cooperate by swinging at ball four. What a dick. 100 pitches for Santana. I guess no pitching in the 7th.

3:05 – Paulino flies out to center. Santana’s day is probably done. That was harder than it had to be. Thanks, ump.

- Bottom of the 6th -

3:09 – Bay leads off with a triple! Hey, welcome to Citi Field Jason! That would have been a single at Fenway.

3:11 – Matthews walks. First and third, nobody out. I’m guessing they don’t score. The Marlins pull Johnson. That can only help the Mets.

3:15 – Francoeur hits a sacrifice fly to center, Bay scores easily. 3-1 Mets. Hey, they didn’t completely fuck it up!

3:17 – Pickoff attempt gets thrown into the dugout, Matthews gets second. And Barajas follows with a double to straightaway center to score Matthews. Wow, that’s like exactly the opposite of fucking it up! 4-1 Mets.

3:18 – Pagan pinch hits for Santana and drives in Barajas with a single. 5-1 Mets to bring up the top of the order and another pitching change for the Marlins. Wow, it’s like I knew what I was talking about!

And on that note, I have to retire. I’ll listen to a little more of the game, but hopefully it will be over before I get back to it.


The game was over before I could get back to it, but the Mets bullpen turned in 3 scoreless innings after I turned off the game and they won going away 7-1. That officially makes April 5, 2010 the first and (potentially) last day the Mets have a better record than the Yankees. No game Tuesday so I still don't get to find out if the move to DirecTV will result in me being able to actually WATCH the games.

Rebecca Lobo asks questions!

She holds a video camera and asks you five questions. Geno may or may not drop a "fuck" in there when referring to his future grandchild. I hope he said "fuck" since I saw this on ESPN and they are owned by Disney and I always like to associate Disney with cursing. I think it's Nancy Kerrigan's fault.

Denard Span hates his mother

Twins outfielder Denard Span fouled off a Phil Hughes pitch, immediately dropped his bat and ran over to the stands as you can see here. Turns out he had just smashed a foul ball into his mother's chest. Unfortunately since it was a spring training game, there are no slow motion replays of ball impacting rib cage from 47 different angles. Instead here is a nice sliding catch Span made against the Royals last (?) year.

Your daily injury report

Daily is obviously a term I will be using loosely. Anyway firstbaseman Daniel Murphy sprained his knee in a rundown Tuesday afternoon. That ups the count to three starting position players who will begin the season the disabled list, joining centerfielder Carlos Beltran and shortstop Jose Reyes. I'll try not to be pessimistic before the season even starts, but it's sure starting to smell like 2009 all over again. Murphy led the team with 12 (!!!) home runs in 2009 and OH MY DOG I LOVE THIS PICTURE!



The final decision has yet to be made, but it looks like the Mets will start Alex Cora who can't hit or play defense over Ruben Tejada who can't hit but is an excellent defender at short. They will start Mike Jacobs who can't hit or play defense over Frank Catalanotto who can't hit but plays okay defense and Chris Carter who can't play defense but he's better than Jacobs and at least he can hit plus he wrote the fucking X-Files at first. Right now it looks like they may start the awesomely named Angel Pagan in centerfield over Gary Matthews Jr which doesn't make a damned lick of sense since Pagan is far and away the superior hitter and fielder.

No can dunk but good fundamentals

Well maybe Xavier's Dee Dee Jernigan should have worked a little harder on either dunking or her fundamentals because she missed two uncontested layups in the waning moments of her team's Elite Eight tilt against Stanford. Either would have given the Musketeers a two point lead, something that seems important given that Stanford's Jeanette Pohlen would race the length of the court for the game winning layup as time expired. Video of the disaster here. Much funnier video below:

Geno Auriemma is a prick

In the competitive world of women's college basketball there are nice guys and there are pricks. Geno Auriemma...he's a prick. He finds himself some girls that respond well to pricks (snicker) and he wins with ruthless regularity. Pat Summitt...she's a nice guy. Reporters love her, her players love her, even opposing coaches love her. It has worked for a long, long, long time, to the tune of 8 national titles. Brittney Griner of Baylor...well, she's a prick too. She's also really tall and good at blocking shots. She is so good she has done blocked Summitt's nice guys right out of the tournament. This marks the second consecutive year the Lady Volunteers have failed to reach at least the elite 8, the longest such streak of futility in their history.

Crosby v Ovechkin

Any time Crosby and the Penguins face off against Ovechkin and the Capitals and it's actually on TV I will be glued to the coachcouch. This gives you, the loyal reader (I assume there's at least one of you) the opportunity for a quick recap. After a slow first period that saw both teams feeling each other out, things picked up in the second period thanks to a fluke goal from Mike Knuble that broke the ice and gave the Caps a 1-0 lead. The Penguins would take a 2-1 lead by the end of the period setting up the dramatic third stanza. Capitals sniper Alexander Semin tied the game with a wicked wrister and after the Capitals took a 3-2 lead, Penguins star Jordan Staal evened the score again with a blistering wrist shot of his own. Following an exiting back and forth overtime, the game would be decided by a shootout. Here is Sidney Crosby giving the Penguins a seemingly insurmountable 2-0 lead in the shootout, followed immediately by Alexander Ovechkin scoring to begin the surmount. The Capitals would win the shootout 3-2.

This could go either way

Jose Reyes has been cleared by team doctors to resume baseball activities. I can see this going either way. On the one hand, after last year I expect the team and the medical staff to be extra cautious and not rush a player back to the field until he is completely healthy. On the other hand, after last year I have absolutely no faith in the training staff and part of me is more than a little nervous that Reyes will be the player who actually dies on the field due to their incompetence.

Why would anyone want to play for this team?

Now I am not saying this team is cursed. Hell I don't even believe in curses...but this team is cursed. Brad Holt, the 33rd pick of the 2008 draft, has thrown exactly one pitch in spring training thus far as shown in the video below:



Fortunately, Holt is not expected to be a contributor to the team this season, meaning the ball hit him in the ass and not the head.

This is news

The New York Giants will open their brand new $1.7 billion stadium on Sunday, September 12. The New York Jets will play their home opener in the same stadium on Monday, September 13. The Jets apparently got their frilly green panties in a bunch on the decision-making process here, and have gone public with their kvetching. It's a good thing nothing else in sports is going on this week, or else there's no way the morning sports talk radio shows would be able to ignore it all and talk about nothing else. It may be an overreaction, but people who spend more than 5 or 10 seconds worrying about the NFL in March should be executed. Just to be safe we should probably eliminate any direct relatives so they could not spread that defective DNA throughout the rest of the world.

In significantly more important news, Versus and DirecTV have come to an agreement allowing the channel to return to the satellite airwaves just in time for the impending NHL playoffs. This is good news for all NFL fans bemoaning the lack of sports in March as I am significantly less likely to stab them in the face. Unless they stick their face between me and the hockey playoffs on TV, in which case we can all agree they were asking for it.

Scott Walker rode the metro

This post from the D.C Sports Bog talks about how Scott Walker, recently acquired from the Carolina Hurricanes, took the Metro to the game the other night because his wife took his car back home to Raleigh. In the video Walker talks about his experience asking for directions and following the crowd. Missing from the video was Walker sucker-punching Aaron Ward when he jostled a man in a Capitals jersey while trying to squeeze through the door as it closed. That video, captured seemingly on a cell-phone camera, appears exclusively here.

I guess the refs didn't get the memo

Hey stripes, when you have Alexander Ovechkin on a national audience playing against US Olympic hero Patrick Kane and the high-flying Chicago Blackhawks, you might want to keep him beyond the 12 minute mark of the first period. It states VERY CLEARLY in the rule book (emphasis added):

"A player who dangerously knocks another player head first into the end boards should be assess a 5-minute boarding penalty and a game misconduct unless the player if marketed as the face of a league desperate to capitalize on the success of the recent Olympics."

Video of the hit is below, judge for yourself if it was a dangerous hit from behind or just an unfortunate result of a large man pushing another man whose razor-sharp skate gets caught in the ice. Your opinion probably depends greatly on your perspective.



Unfortunately, Brian Campbell suffered an upper body injury, likely a broken clavicle and broken ribs, and may be done for the season. Of course, he's a hockey player, so he's probably day to day.

Conflicting emotions

Is it hockey season yet? Wait, it's STILL fucking hockey season? Then how in the hell did the Mets season go to hell before the goddamned playoffs started?

OVECHKIN!

Former best player in the world, Mr. Jaromir Jagr, meet current best player in the world, Mr. Alexander Ovechkin. Ouch.

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Good things happen when you win

The United States team of young NHL players held off a furious onslaught from Canada's older NHL players and secured the top seed in the medal round of the Olympic hockey tournament. Thanks mostly to goalie Ryan Miller's 42 saves, the US won 5-3. According to experts (in this case me) the top teams in the tournament are in no particular order, the US, Canada, Sweden, Finland, Russia, the Czech Republic, and Slovakia. Thanks to finishing as the #1 overall seed, the US can theoretically advance to the gold medal game having played only, well "only", the winner of Finland versus (presumably) the Czech Republic. To see Ryan Kesler's spectacular game-icing, empty net goal go here. Note that you'll have to install Microsoft's peeping tom flashlight or something like that.

Ohno bags silver

I'm not entirely sure how to say "You're a cunt" in Korean, but if you were really curious you could ask Lee Ho-Suk and Sung Si-Bak of South Korea who took each other out of the 1500 meter final of the men's short track speed skating competition. With countryman Lee Jung-Su pulling away for the gold, Lee and Sung were jostling for position on the final turn when they knocked skates and fell into the padding. Opportunistic Americans Apolo Ohno and 19 year old J.R. Celski avoided playing grab-ass long enough to take silver and bronze, respectively. It was Ohno's American record-tying 6th speed skating medal.

NBA history!

The Dallas Mavericks and Washington Wizards made NBA history late Saturday night by exchanging Drew Gooden and DeShawn Stevenson. Gooden and Stevenson famously engaged in a contest a couple of years ago to see who could make himself less appealing to women. Back in the '07/'08 season Gooden and Stevenson tried to see who could go the longest without trimming his beard. This marks the first time in NBA history that two players who engaged in a beard-growing contest were exchanged for each other in a subsequent season. Also included in the deal were nothing all stars like Caron Butler and Josh Howard, signaling Washington's willingness to break up a core group of players that helped them finish in last place year after year.

Friday wrapup

Last night featured marquee several matchups. The headliner was this season's first bout between Sidney Crosby and Alex Ovechkin that I did didn't watch because it wasn't on TV. The under card was led by Kobe Bryant versus LeBron James that I didn't watch because I didn't care. So what did I watch? Well, the first two hour episode of the 24 premier which sucked because 24 sucks these days. Don't worry, I'll keep watching because I'm stupid. Also, I watched one of the least hot matchups you'll ever seen in women's tennis, Justine Henin taking out 27 seed Alisa Kleybanova in 3 sets. Wait was that mean? That was mean. The tennis was beautiful until the hulking Kleybanova wilted in the Australian heat and humidity and got blown off the court by the sleeker Henin. Hey Justine, wear a longer skirt next time, your massive black cock is showing!



Also blown off the court last night was the men's 7 seed Andy Roddick. I assume he was blown off the court given that he's married to swimsuit model Brooklyn Decker. On the court he served to a crisp 74% first service percentage en route to a tidy 4 set win over pesky Spaniard Felciano Lopez.

Balls

Coming off a stirring run to the finals of the 2009 Confederations Cup, the US National Soccer team filled its fans with hope for the upcoming 2010 World Cup. Add to that a favorable draw, and the US is hoping to advance out of the pool play for the first time in history. That is, they were until they let the Mets training staff take over, leading to a rash of injuries to key players Charlie Davies, Oguchi Onyewu, and now Clint Dempsey. I caught up with Landon Donovan and Tim Howard as they ran a complicated training maneuver under the watchful eye of Mets trainer Ray Ramirez. Both men seemed unconcerned with the injuries while juggling razor-sharp swords, poisonous snakes, and what appeared to be a grenade without its pin. When asked to comment, Donovan expressed faith in what he called, "Ray's capable hands."

Marvin Harrison is a bad dude

Former Colts receiver Marvin Harrison is an all-time great receiver. If he never plays another down in the NFL, he is a sure-fire hall of famer. That being said, if you come across Harrison on the streets of Philadelphia...run! Run like the wind! And you may want to bob and weave too, because that son of a bitch is packing and he won't give two shits who he hits when he fires! Check out this story by Jason Fagone in the latest GQ.

That Crosby kid is pretty good

I heard on SportsCenter this morning that Barry Melrose called this the goal of the year. I don't know about all that, but any time a guy splits two NHL defenders and beats an All Star goalie he gets his video on this blog. Well anytime I hear or read about it and bother to post because I'm really, really lazy. It is the first highlight of the incredibly long highlight package below.

Oh crap

During a forgettable 2009 season, June 23 stands out as a particularly memorable day. That was the date the Mets placed star center fielder Carlos Beltran on the 15 day disabled list with a bone bruise on his right knee. Already missing Jose Reyes and Carlos Delgado and with a pitching staff somewhat in shambles, the Mets found themselves at 35-34, a mere 2 1/2 games out of first place in the division. It was the final blow to the team's chances, as Beltran had been enjoying a stellar season and had to be considered one of the front-runners for the non-Pujols National League MVP award. By the time Beltran returned to the lineup three months later the Mets were 14 games under .500 and closer to the last place Nationals in the standings than the first place Phillies. As of this writing, there has been no improvement made to the pitching staff, meaning a healthy Beltran is the key to fielding at least a competitive team in 2010.

Actually, let me try wording this a different way:

FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!
FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!
FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!
FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!
FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!
FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!

Alabama wins BCS National Title

Heisman Trophy finalist Colt McCoy foolishly tried a stranger prior to the National Title game to calm his nerves. He unfortunately sat on his hand too long and was unable to continue play after the first series. True freshman replacement Garrett Gilbert did his best to replace McCoy but ultimately his 4 interceptions and costly fumble late in the game stalled the valiant comeback attempt.



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Wrapped up in Ivy

The number one college basketball team in ALL the land survived an upset scare from a more than game Cornell University. Kansas ran its NCAA-best home winning streak to 51 games by squeaking out a 71-66 victory. The Jayhawks trailed by a point with less than a minute to go before senior guard Sherron Collins took control of the game. Honestly, I'm not sure why everyone is so surprised. Cornell's mascot is a big fucking bear, which could kick the shit out of a jayhawk. What the fuck is a jayhawk anyway? Oh. Yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and take the bear in that fight, even if he has minty, fresh breath. Cornell's the Big Red, you see. What's that? You don't have the jingle stuck in your head? Hahahaha! FUCK YOU!

Well that's a shame

Led by RPI's superstar freshman Jerry D'Amigo, the US exploded to a 5-3 third period lead. Canada dramatically tied the game in the last 3 minutes and, I presume, won the game in overtime. I mean, no team can overcome that kind of meltdown, right? HOLE! LEE! SHIT! Damn my inability to stay up past 10 PM! What is it about sweaty teen-aged boys that's so damned hot? I mean, uh, check out the video!

Dog bless the interwebs

You know what the best part of the Internet is? Oh, right, porn. You know what the second best part of the Internet is? People who willingly humiliate themselves in hopes that, I don't know, when people laugh at them in the supermarket there's finally a reason for it? Hey, are those a couple of Red Rockers? Eh, it's probably not worth it.



With Leather via Puck Daddy

RPI hockey player succeeding on World stage

RPI freshman Jerry D'Amigo scored twice last night in the World Junior Championships to help lead the US team into the finals against Canada. D'Amigo's first goal tied the game at two in the second period, and his second gave the Americans a comfortable 4-2 lead on their way to a 5-2 victory over the Swedes of Sweden. Hey, someone get that kid a beer, uh, an RPI girl, um, some lube and a tissue? Anyway, the victory prevented a third straight finals matchup between Sweden and Canada. The US will skate for the gold against their cuddly neighbors to the north on Tuesday at 8 PM. Be sure to tune into the NHL Network to see how it all turns out! Just kidding, I know you won't watch. Be sure to tune in to the blog Wednesday when I forget to update you with the results!

Wes Welkahhhh noooooo!!!!!

A nation mourns today as Wes Welker's dreamy, blue eyes have been dimmed. The man whose piercing gaze captured our hearts will miss the playoffs after tearing the ACL and MCL in his left knee attempting to cut upfield against the Houston Texans on Sunday.